In senior year of high school, I got the unfortunate schedule assignment of 4th period lunch! Fourth period began at 10:40 – not the most desirable time to eat lunch. AND there were only about 20 seniors in the whole lunch period. What a miserable schedule to endure in senior year!
Twenty-something years later, I realize that 4th period lunch was an immense gift. That is when my love story with the Eucharistic Jesus began.
As a teen, I had only a hint of knowledge about faith and not much personal experience with Jesus, which I think is fairly common. However, I went to a special high school, run by a religious community whose true mission is to help their students become saints. At the school Holy Communion was offered before every lunch period! However, I wasn’t the type of Catholic teenager who was going to hit the chapel because of fervor or zeal.
BUT – one of my good friends, who also had 4th period lunch, was a Eucharistic Minister, and before heading to lunch, he had to help with distributing communion. And, honestly, I was too introverted to go to lunch without a buddy and possibly sit alone for 5 minutes. So instead I went to the chapel with my friend.
Eventually, I looked forward to that midday break with God. I can’t remember how often I received communion. It was definitely frequent, if not daily. It became part of my routine – communion then lunch. At the time I didn’t think much of this. It was just something I did.
Do you see how God works in mysterious ways?
I was so upset about being assigned 4th period lunch. And yet – it was for His purposes. He wanted to begin to draw me in to Him through the Eucharist. He wanted me to actually BE WITH HIM (As Catholics, we hold that Jesus is really, and truly present in the bread and wine. It is not a symbol), so He used my insecurities of sitting alone at lunch to bring me to the chapel for daily communion.
Of course, this is just the beginning of a long and winding love story with God. In fact, for a long time I didn’t even know this story existed! But last year, as I worked my way through an at-home Ignatian retreat, I spent time discovering where God has been throughout my life and how He has worked through sorrow and joy, pain and pleasure, sin and grace.
I found that my personal love story with God – you could say the highlight reel of my story – always features the Eucharistic Jesus.
And why shouldn’t it?! Jesus’ sacrifice on Good Friday is the greatest gift of true love ever given, and he offered that gift, His sacrifice, for each one of us individually. He made it just for you because He loves you unto death. And He didn’t stop there.
He has made His sacrifice of love visible to us in every tabernacle of every church throughout the world in the form of the Eucharist. He loves us to such an extent that every single day He comes to us in the form of tiny piece of bread.
Jesus’ True Presence in the Eucharist is the proof of His love for us.
By the end of my time in high school, I knew God existed. Through his sacrifice of love, the Eucharist, my heart began to know Him. The seeds of love were planted in my heart. I knew I loved my growing faith. I was drawn inexplicably to the Mass. I had begun to see Beauty and Goodness around me. I was excited for my life as a Catholic.
Again, I didn’t realize any of these things at THAT time. I didn’t think – “Wow, God really loves me because of Holy Communion.” I don’t know if I had ever really thought about the True Presence, and no amount of discussion or teaching about the True Presence would’ve made me grow in love for God.
It’s only now looking back I see it. By being constantly in touch with Jesus in the Eucharist, I began to change. Just as we can’t perceive our children growing until their pants are too short, or see the seasons changing until the flowers are blooming, subtly, our relationship began to grow.
And then, I grew in virtue, piety and love for Jesus year after year, and I lived happily ever after…
HAHAHAHA! JUST KIDDING! Honestly, that sounds like the most unrealistic love story ever.
There is a lot more to my story. Every love story exists with both highs – moments of great devotion, strong affection, enjoyment – and lows – arguments, distance, separation, fading feelings, struggle. Not every love story endures. If Jesus weren’t God, our story would have been over. Thank God, His mercy endures forever, because college led to some real struggle. Stay tuned for the next post…
In the meantime, I invite you to use Lent as a time to think about these things. Maybe like me, you don’t realize that a love story with God is being written in your life. But He is there. When has He drawn you in to Himself? How has He pursued you? When did you first begin to notice Him? When was the first time you realized He loved you? Or you loved Him? I’d love to hear your stories too!
